Happy
Mother’s Day to all mothers and potential mothers. Many of us have experienced
a loss of our mothers, and on Mother’s Day we
reminisce about them and remember things and stories that have kept them
alive in our memories and thoughts. On this glorious day, I urge all of you to
take a moment and pen a story (or two, three, or even more) about your mother
and what you have learned from them. Here is one of those stories and some of
the values I learned from my mother.
Barbara Hammon, my mother who died way too early! |
Learning from mothers: Using the
raspberry patch to teach and learn
Mothers
can be subtle in their teaching. Thankfully. Most mothers do not sit down with
their children and say, “OK, I’m going to teach you X. Now get out your pencils
and notebooks (iPads, Twitter and Facebook accounts, and all those other social media things) and take notes.” Rather, mothers teach through showing
and loving their children. Many of those teaching moments happen during a work
project or just being together.
Taking
time in the raspberry patch was just one of my mother’s ways of teaching me.
Although I may not have realized it at the time. She didn’t intentionally try
to teach me anything. Her way of teaching was showing me how to do lots of
things, in particular as we worked together picking raspberries during the
summer months.
Here
are five things she taught me while we picked raspberries:
Complete a task from
start to finish
Completing
the raspberry picking didn’t stop in the middle of the row, nor almost at the
end. Picking to the end of the row was the completion of the task. Granted, we
stopped periodically to rest and carefully pour the berries into little green
pint baskets, but we never quit until the entire patch was picked for the day.
Always to do a good
job
Most
mothers are fanatics about making sure you do a good job, and do it well. She
wants to make sure you do the job correctly and proficiently. When you pick
raspberries, you should pick all the ripe ones, which is no small chore because
many of the berries are hidden beneath leaves, inside of the bushes, and way
down low on the hanging branches. Over the years, my mother showed me how to
lift the vines gently with a leather glove on the left hand and pick with the
right. I can still hear my mother’s voice, piercing the still morning air,
saying: “Darrel, bend a bit lower and pick the big hidden ones, hanging on the
lower limbs.”
Review the work you
have done to make sure you did it correctly
Often,
it seems, you have to look back on what you are doing to see if you are
following the right steps, or look at the job from a different angle. Looking
at it just one way doesn’t always give you the perspective you need to complete
the task. Picking raspberries was no different. Once finished, we walked slowly
back up the rows we had just picked so we could review what we had done —
reaching out and picking one of the berries we had missed. Rather, I had
missed. My mother’s words, “Good job,” never failed to give me a wonderful
feeling for the day.
Work together
because it is more fun
The
age-old adage “Many hands make light work,” is just plain truth. Working
together not only makes work a little easier, it also brings families closer
together. What I enjoyed most was working side by side with mother. Sometimes
we would talk about whatever, often nothing really important. We would have
contests like who could pick the biggest raspberry. Winning wasn’t totally the
point. It was working together as a team, finishing as a team, and having fun
simultaneously.
Help others finish
their tasks
Perhaps,
helping others with their work was an important concept in my learning. When
you work in teams, working together toward a common goal is paramount in
bringing a project to successful fruition. Picking raspberries meant working as
a team. While we each had a side of the row, we truly worked in tantamount. My
mother would normally beat me to the end of the raspberry row. She would turn
down my side and work toward me. But I suspect she held up once in a while to
see if I would reciprocate. If I ever finished before she did, which was
seldom, I started on her side and picked toward her. It didn’t bother me to
help, and I continue doing it.
Often
we learned things from our mothers that weren’t overt at the beginning. Only
when we look back on the situation does it finally occur to us, “Hey, I
actually learned something from that incident.” Now, as I continue to complete
those events, I realize I have personally reaped great benefits from the early
mornings picking raspberries with my mother. A very Happy Mother's Day to my beautiful wife and my two daughters are incredible mothers because of the values and teachings they have learned and implemented from their mother:
Joanne, an incredible mother! |